Dad Joke collection
The dad joke is a pejorative term used to describe a corny, unfunny, or predictable joke, typically a pun. Generally inoffensive, dad jokes are traditionally told by fathers among family, either with sincere humorous intent, or to intentionally provoke a negative reaction to its “dagginess”. One of the most common “dad jokes” goes as follows. A child will say to the dad, “I am hungry.” To which the dad will reply, “Hi Hungry, I am dad.” Many dad jokes may be considered anti-jokes, deriving humour from an intentionally unfunny punchline.
I start my collection from this one:
Me: ‘Dad, make me a sandwich!’ Dad: ‘Abra kadabra, Poof, You’re a sandwich!’
I really enjoy Dad Jokes but don’t get all of them. Many of them based on a language slang that makes it not only interesting but also knowledgeable
I asked my North Korean friend how it was there, he said he couldn’t complain.
I decided to sell my vacuum cleaner, because it was just collecting dust
I decided to sell your vacuum cleaner because it sucked
I have a phobia of over-engineered buildings - its a complex complex complex.
What’s the difference between a well dressed man on a unicycle and a poorly dressed man on a bike? Attire. (Attire is a costume and A tire)
I think it’s wrong that only one company makes the game Monopoly.
With the UK leaving the EU, the union has some free space: Exactly 1GB
Two windmills are standing in a field and one asks the other, “What kind of music do you like?” The other says, “I’m a big metal fan”
Apparently there is a new miniature banana being developed. They call it “banano”
What is grammar? The difference between knowing your shit, and knowing you’re shit.
To the person who stole my MS Office, I’m coming after you. You have my Word.
Why are there fences around graveyards? Because people are dying to get in!
How did pirates collaborate before computers? Pier to pier networking
I have a fear of speed bumps. I’m slowly getting over it.
My dad didn’t have 19 candles, but he had a 4 candle. So he said this cake is 4 your burthday …
How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.
Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? Great food, no atmosphere.
I’m terrified of elevators. I’m goig to start taking steps to avoid them.
What did the buffalo say to his son when he left for college? Bison
Why Did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field
Why do chicken coops only have two doors? Because if they had four, they would be chicken sedans!
It’s not that the man did not know how to juggle, he just didn’t have the balls to do it.
What do you do to dead chemists? You barium.
Why don’t some couples go to the gym? Because some relationships just don’t work out.
Today a man knocked on my door and asked for a small donation towards the local swimming pool. I gave him a glass of water.